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08 November 2008 @ 05:51 pm
My Heart Belongs To Two  

Title: My Heart Belongs to Two

Genre: Romance

Rating: PG-13

Threesome: Han Geng//Heechul//Yesung

Summary: Yesung finds himself in a compromising and somewhat depressing position. He’s in love with two of his fellow members, both of whom are in a relationship with each other.

 

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By the time he realized it, it was too late to just push it away to the back of his mind.

 

He watched as Han Geng walked by him as he entered the living room, his dark chocolate eyes peering at him from behind his long bangs.

 

He watched as Heechul strode in after him, his arms coming to wrap around the Chinese member’s waist fondly, his chin resting on top of his shoulder.

 

His hand clenched the fabric over his heart, straining not to show his anguish. He was in love with both of them, and yet the two of them were with each other and he was left to watch them both in the background.

 

I love you… He loved Han Geng and his quiet and warm nature. It had been so easy not to resist those handsome smiles until it was too late.

 

I love you… He loved Heechul, with all his vanity and all-too annoying and demeaning confidence. The way his slender fingers brushed his stomach when he playfully flopped over his shoulders was too much to bear and soon he was head-over-heels in love with not one, but two.

 

If it hurt to love one of them, it hurt twice as much to love both of them, the pain in his heart growing more and more every time he saw them in each other’s arms.

 

He longed to whisper I-love-you’s to them in the quiet of the night and wished to feel the warmth of their arms around him but it was all too impossible to him.

 

They were both happy with each other, and he loved them too much to separate them for his own selfish desires.

 

So he sat and watched them from afar. The others knew, he could tell, from their worried glances that they sent him whenever the two embraced and kissed in plain view.

 

He managed to hide it from them, with well-placed smiles and excuses to leave whenever they came within his vision or earshot of him.

 

While they smiled and played, he cried in his room. Why did it have to be them? Why?

 

It was heart-wrenchingly painful to see them wherever he went, like pins stabbing his heart. Everywhere he saw things that reminded him of his love that never would be, and his heart died again and again each time.

 

He was afraid they knew, that one time he couldn’t take watching them as he longed for them and left the house without a word and a slam of the door. He had come home looking like the living dead, drunk and disheveled.

 

He couldn’t remember much of that night, but the next morning he had awoken to a sinking feeling and a hangover. He didn’t see them at all that day and only came across them the next morning.

 

Since then, he had avoided them altogether, escaping to his quiet and empty room for solace. The others glanced at him worriedly from time-to-time, his sleeplessness beginning to show during the day.

 

Honestly, he may have wished that he had never fallen in love with the two of them in the first place, but in the back of his mind, he knew it wasn’t true. To see their smiles everyday made his heart beat seconds faster than normal and he couldn’t go a day without hearing the sounds of their voices.

 

He sighed, glad no one was home to hear him or see him if he should end up a crying drunken mess in the living room. Languidly, he stroked Heebum between her ears, the Russian Blue purring slightly at the attention before she leapt off his lap and to the door to the dorm.

 

Before he knew it, the door clicked open and in came the two people he hadn’t wished to see at the moment, the both of them coming back from what they had said was their night out.

 

“We’re home~” Han Geng said, his voice light. Heechul picked up Heebum and kissed her nose fondly before the both of them noticed Yesung sitting on the couch by himself.

 

He took a single look and promptly started getting up slowly, trying to act convincing. He picked up his papers and his book and started to leave the room for his.

 

“Wait, Yesung!” Han Geng called after him and quickly caught up to him, grabbing his arm gently but firmly.

 

“Yesung.” He turned around but didn’t look at his face, his eyes cast down at the floor.

 

His hand came up to grasp his fingers, digits trembling, and he pried his slender strong fingers off his arm forcefully. He noticed the hurt in the older member’s eyes as he does and he desperately wanted to say sorry but he tried instead to keep a straight face.

 

If he apologizes, then he’ll start to cry and at the moment, the last thing he needed was more tears.

 

He didn’t say anything and started to leave again, but sooner than later, Han Geng grabs his arm again, this time more tightly and Yesung winced slightly as his fingertips dug into the skin of his bare arm when his blanket slipped from his shoulders and onto the floor below.

 

“Yesung, look at me.” The younger refused to obey, despite his want to. He noticed Heechul had come to stand next the Chinese member’s side.

 

“Yah, we’re only worried we did something wrong. At least tell us what’s wrong.” The most effeminate of the three said, putting Heebum onto the floor.

 

“I-I can’t…” he managed to force from his lips, with barely the volume of a whisper.

 

“Why not?” Han Geng asked. Yesung could hear the pain in the other’s voice and he wanted to cover his ears so that he wouldn’t say something he would regret.

 

“Y-You don’t understand…you wouldn’t understand…please, just let me go…” he pleaded, trying to twist out of the older member’s firm grasp.

 

“Not until you tell us what’s wrong. Don’t you trust us anymore?” Han Geng asked, his grip unwavering.

 

Not with my heart, I don’t… “Please…let go of me…” he begged, feeling wetness collect in the corners of his eyes.

 

“Yesung…please…we’re not going to hurt you.” Silly…you already have…

 

Yesung, by some miracle, pried himself from Han Geng’s arms and shied away from them when they almost caught him again.

 

“Why’re you avoiding us, Yesung?” Heechul asked, and it pained him to actually hear Heechul’s voice the slightest bit hurt.

 

He was cornered and there was no way out, and he felt Han Geng’s hand at his shoulder, turning him around.

 

“I love you, I love you both, and it hurts too much, but I love you!” he confessed in an outburst. The shock he gave them was enough for him to run to his room, his tears finally escaping his eyes and coursing down his cheeks.

 

He didn’t look back and closed his door with a slam, slightly glad that his bed was near the door. He curled up on the downy stark-white sheets and cried, his fingers pulling out the photo frame underneath his pillow.

 

He opened the leather book-like frame, his tear-blurred eyes still able to see the pictures of both his loves on each side. He closed it and clutched their smiles to his heart and cried, because he would never be able to have them and their love.

 

He fell asleep with his tears drying on his face, streaks on his cheeks and his eyes damp. Some dark strands of his hair stuck to his cheeks wetly, and his skin and eyes were stinging as he wept himself to slumber.

 

They both loved him, he knew, but not the way he wanted, wished for.

 

He was deep asleep when they came in, and laid down on either side of him. He only awoke when he felt gentle hands caressing his hair and his eyes slowly opened, tiny droplets clinging onto his eyelashes stubbornly. They opened with a flash when he saw Heechul’s face looking back at him only inches away and he gasped.

 

“W-Wha…” He didn’t understand why he was there and then he felt his back being pulled against the other’s torso, his toes brushing against his cotton pants by a hair’s width.

 

He tried to break free, thinking that this was some cruel joke someone was playing on him, but only felt warm arms wrap around his own arms gently, and he looked like he was going to cry again.

 

“I d-don’t understand…why...why are y-you…” he breathed out shakily. It was evident in his eyes that he was completely and utterly confused, his glimmering orbs as wide as a terrified 6 yr old child’s.

 

“Shhh…” He heard Han Geng’s voice hushing him like a soothing melody, and he melted a little in his arms. Heechul scooted a little closer to the both of them. He realized his expression was probably a bit annoyed because Yesung shied away slightly in fear, and he had to bring his hand to his face to calm him down, lovingly wiping his tears, something uncharacteristic of him.

 

The youngest of the three of them looked back and forth between them, comfortable enough to not try and run but still confused and very much shocked. He was still asking himself if this was a dream and if he closed his eyes, would it all go away?

 

Or did they just feel pity for him?

 

As this thought registered in his mind, he suddenly pulled himself and sat up, tears collecting in his eyes again.

 

“I-If you’re only doing this…b-because you f-feel sor-sorry for me, I-I don’t want it..!” he pushed out from his throat, his voice trembling.

 

Heechul sat up with him and hugged him from behind gingerly but still firmly, enough to get his point across but careful enough so he wouldn’t break him.

 

“Don’t be stupid…we know what we’re doing…” he said softly, with just enough roughness in his voice to still sound like the Heechul he had fallen in love with. And he pressed a kiss to Yesung’s still tear-stained cheek, the younger stiffening in his arms.

 

“We…we talked and…we’re willing to try…and love you like you love us…” Han Geng said hesitantly, watching Yesung’s face for any change in expression. Said member only looked away to gaze at the closed leatherbound frame in his lap.

 

“Yesung…are you listening?” The Chinese member asked in worry. The youngest didn’t move and he sighed, and slid over to them so his legs were on either side of their bodies and Yesung was in between them both.

 

He wrapped one arm around his smaller body and the other gently forced Yesung to look up. He pressed a kiss to his temple as Heechul rested his chin on his shoulder, nuzzling his jawline and breathing in his scent.

 

The two older members entwined their arms around him and hugged him protectively in the circle of their arms, shushing him and simultaneously whispering the words he had wanted to hear the most from them.

 

“I love you.”

 

His eyes widened as he heard those words pass from their lips and he couldn’t help but cry, his tears pouring out between closed eyelids. And they smiled and kissed both his cheeks and all his tears with all their love.

 

He held their smiles close to his heart, teardrops falling onto their picture-caught joy, and added with theirs, his own happiness.

 

 

“I love you too…”

 

 

-----

 

Omo, I’m crying now…why do I always put Sungie through such pain? *sigh* Even I do not know for sure…

 

Well, please, oh please, tell me your thoughts on this^^ Because this was my first threesome-type fic and I really want to know how I did.

 I really appreciate the time anybody took to read this and/or comment on it^^

 
 
Current Location: on the moon
Current Mood: sympatheticsympathetic
Current Music: Disturbia : Rihanna
 
 
Ming♥amine87 on November 8th, 2008 11:08 pm (UTC)
Xd

I thought when we do have a bias for someone, it's lovely to put him into pain or maybe not, don't kill me please?


and yay xD~ for YeHanChul, you portray them well I can imagine it xD

but still, poor Sungie.. x_x
Luna Memoria: Heo Youngsaeng : SS501aznk_popaddict on November 8th, 2008 11:28 pm (UTC)
Hehe I won't kill you, you don't have to worry about that~

I do notice that I tend to put people I bias in a lot of pain...I must love Yesung a lot then o__O

I portrayed it well? I was worried there wasn't enough emotion...

Yes, I feel guilty for paining Sungie so...
(Deleted comment)
Luna Memoria: Jaejoong : Fanartaznk_popaddict on November 8th, 2008 11:32 pm (UTC)
Well, I tried? Like I said, I was really inspired today to finish this, hehe

Wow, you really could? My fic has fulfilled its purpose then *other than its purpose to please, of course*

I'm glad you liked it :) I think I may write an EunHae after I finish typing my Kyu-centric fic^^

Well, HaeHyuk, because the request was Hae on top, hehe XD
reality has so many adverse side effects: Super Juniorsvtstarlight on November 9th, 2008 12:48 am (UTC)
It's a really sweet and touching story and I felt so bad for poor Yesung. *huggles him* I'm glad it had a happy ending for him...he deserves it. <3

baby_buggsbaby_buggs on November 9th, 2008 02:03 am (UTC)
yehanchul!! I love it! but why must you put yesunggie through so much pain???
Luna Memoria: Yesung is Sexy Defined.aznk_popaddict on November 9th, 2008 06:24 am (UTC)
Blame my Yesung-bias DXX

It makes me do terrible things...I make him go through a lot of pain to get his happy ending XP

If we like someone, we tend to make them go through a lot of hardships...I must love Yesung a lot then >.<

Glad you enjoyed my fic :333
ArkSky~HappyGoth~arksky on November 9th, 2008 05:54 am (UTC)
this was so adorable and sweet,gah! It's so nice how you put angst but where able to put in that extra touch of sweetness~♥♥
Luna Memoriaaznk_popaddict on November 9th, 2008 06:30 am (UTC)
Oh, you know me. I'm a sucker for happy endings^^

I'm glad you liked this^^ I'm coming up with a KangSung soon and a couple other Yesung fics as well^^
There's no obvious, rational form for sadness...: BW-Gacktmardigrasmaven on November 9th, 2008 09:26 am (UTC)
You put Sungie through all that pain so he can come out of it happy! :D I loved it, I'm glad they decided to give it a try and make it work with Yesung... he needed them.
xvxkuromi on November 9th, 2008 10:39 am (UTC)
Duyen ~~~~ <3
YeHanChul or is it HanChulYe? Oh wells, wich ever is still good XD <3
I <3 HanChul, and now throw Sungie into the mix. Its even better XD
But heck ~ why must u always make Sungie suffer? Its so heartbreaking D: but thank godness HanChil is willing to give it a try <3

YAYS on ur first 3some ~
Now maybe u can do a dream threesome? X333
<3333
Luna Memoriaaznk_popaddict on November 9th, 2008 08:06 pm (UTC)
Hehe maybe, but I'll probably end up making Sungie the bottom, lmao

And it'll probably be a little angsty >___>
g_myzo on November 9th, 2008 01:47 pm (UTC)
Wow, anguish. Yesung loves Hanchul D: poor yesungie..
wah, my heart was hurting when hankyung was holding yesung's arm and he had that inner monologue..
gyahh~ you near killed me. i love it so much. yesung was so vulnerable. No question your writing skills are amazing.
Luna Memoriaaznk_popaddict on November 9th, 2008 08:25 pm (UTC)
Oh, I'm not that good >.<

I know plenty of people who are way better, like miracle_shining^^
g_myzo on November 10th, 2008 01:58 pm (UTC)
No use being humble, I've already sniffed you out as one of the greater writing talents around.. ^^
mylittlebambimylittlebambi on November 9th, 2008 02:14 pm (UTC)
waa....poor sungie....T^T

but....erm....i wanted to say something more....but i forgot? *gets bricked*
wicked l'il flamevolatileflame on November 9th, 2008 08:06 pm (UTC)
i know YehSung's pain T^T
this was beautiful ♥
spazzncutespazzncute on November 13th, 2008 12:40 am (UTC)
....awwwwww...happy ending...but even though i love angsty yesung....y does he always have to be the one to get hurt the most...in majority of the stories i've read...y?!?!?
Rin-Rinjrockerlove on October 7th, 2009 11:41 pm (UTC)
omg that was so sweet! Totaly made me cry!